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Drive by post since Iapos;m watching Heroes and I put it on pause.
Frankapos;s sister (my hubbyapos;s sis)�gave birth to a gorgeous baby boy today. I went to the hospital and dropped off Jacob and Frankie with Grandma Jean. This baby is so perfect and gorgeous. Heapos;s so small even though he was 8 lbs. I�am telling you, babies are a gift from God. To hold such a young precious life in your arms (even though he is not my own) wow. Such beauty, so handsome, such life

Thank you Jesus for a healthy birth and a quick recovery to mum. She had a C section (OUCH ) He has no name yet, heapos;s just a beautiful, healthy baby boy.

I�will post pics tomorrow on here and facebook. Wow. Iapos;m so elated. Its not even my baby but Iapos;m so happy I�could cry
�

Now, Iapos;m off to Heroes

::unpauses::
Joy
�

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...nobody knows how comforting that is.

I spent years blaming myself only to now realize the problem isnapos;t because of me. Iapos;ve been going through this so many times it has become a routine and Iapos;m sick of it. Its time for a change. I will not stick around and be subdued to everyoneapos;s merry go round they call friendship. Iapos;m going to walk away from it.

Iapos;m waiting, wanting anxiously. I canapos;t stand this.

So what the hell am I babbling about, might you ask? Its everyone Iapos;ve come in contact with,�friends and family becoming my enemies and acquaintances. Iapos;m sick of getting close to someone only to realize theyapos;ve been wearing a mask, would rather be with someone better (prettier, wilder, funner),�wants to hurt me for their amusement,�or is just plain sick of me as well. Thats fine with me. Iapos;m used to it now. But I wonapos;t stand around here. I wonapos;t wait for them to change. I wonapos;t let them mess with me anymore. Iapos;m done.

Sometimes it hurts to change all youapos;ve ever known.

Iapos;m blocking everyone out. Iapos;m taking the risk of loneliness.�I vow now to never get close to anyone ever again.

Iapos;m feeling alone inside this crowd.

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What kind of person am I when I have a dream with Rambo, the Hulk, some radiologist and Gary freakin Coleman are all singing "Eat it" by Weird Al Yankovitch? To top it off, I wake up in the middle of the tune, just as a new sun is born in the middle of a big city, a tiny dot that suddenly gets ignited and I wake up to the screams of millions. It was part of the lyrics, I swear
What
Does
That
Say
About
Me?
I blame it on the diet. (23lbs off)
Maybe I should have a bannana, have a whole bunch.
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I had a fantastic night honestly... I spent it hanging around some really incredible friends and I canapos;t be happier than to be here. It feels like Iapos;m so much more happier here than when I was back in Tahoe and with the people I was around. They werenapos;t allowing me to be me and Iapos;m so thankful to be here where I am and with the people Iapos;m with. Itapos;s awesome and I honestly donapos;t have any other way to describe it than awesome and for how thankful that I am... :) Tonight I am just so happy to be me... :) I guess thatapos;s all for now..
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due ex machina

So lots of stuffs has happened lately.� some totally meaningless things and also some uber awsome cool things.� i just recently had this fun picnic thing with joey anika jen anthony and samai. It was fun.� im not sure what the fuss was about with anthony.� everyone told me he was a major ass but i thought he was cool. According to joey he USED to be an ass but now hes cool.� hmm.

school is fine.� its getting a bit more time consuming but for the most part things are still fine.� apparently my fafsa still hasnt come.� im not sure what the problem is.� the school said everything was fine now so i think im gona go complain on monday.

things with me and connor are pretty cool. Weve gotten lots closer.� this whole living together has really brought us together.� i had a bad feeling that we were actually gona get sick of eachother.� i think the only bad part is that we almost broke up this one time but it blew over.� things have been like a shiny rainbow filled fun day from then.� im really happy with him right now.� it saddens me that he constantly worries about me throwing him away the second i get the chance to be with someone better.� im not like that.� i know for a fact that people are out there better than him�but i ALSO know that there are plenty of people out there that are better than me that he could get yet he says that hed rather be with me.� thats my thought too.� id rather be with him.� hes too important.� there are ups and downs but we manage to get through them.� well, anyways, i just came back home today.� i hate it here already.� i want to go back.� i think ill just give it a week and see how things go.� im actually trying to get connor to go back to his sardine can for safety and personal reasons.� lets just say im uber worried and it had to do with me leaving in the first place.� sadly, i think things wont be seen until a catastrophe ensues.� i may be wrong but i think i know who it is thats behind the sudden mind change.� it almost seems obvious due to clashing, mild hatred, and all those OBVIOUS dirty looks that i never miss.

im already being reminded of why i never wanted to come back here and why i wanted to leave so bad in first place.� ive realized that i�have more grief and bad memories in this place than good ones.� it doesnt take a genious to know that it isnt a good thing.� i need to resist going back though.

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frank todd whitlow

Come one, come all, to the South Jersey Witches Ball

All are welcome... This is a fundraising event for SJPPD.

When: Friday, November 7th. 8 pm to 1 am.
Where: The 25 Club in Maple Shade, NJ
Costume Theme: "Get a Past Life" Come as your favorite past life.. Or
someone elses

Who: 18 to party, 21 to drink. Beer wine available, or BYOB.
How: Must buy tickets in advance Will-call is okay but no tickets
will be sold at the door.

How Much: $40 per person, $70 per couple, $300 for a table of 10.
Includes: Dinner Dessert, Dancing, Champagne Toast, Entry into the
Costume Contest, and entry into Door Prize Drawing.

Other info: We will have an ancestor altar set up at the front of the
room. Please feel free to bring a photo or memento of your lost loved
ones (prefer copies) to place on the altar. Psychic readings with
Sherry ($30) will be available before and after dinner. We will also
have a collection for new, unwrapped toys for donations to CHOP.

For tickets please visit www.southjerseypaganpride.org or send paypal
to southjerseypaganpride@gmail.com.

REMEMBER, TICKETS MUST BE PURCHASED IN ADVANCE WE ARE NOT ALLOWED TO
SELL TICKETS AT THE DOOR
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"One-third of American pediatric endocrinologists offer growth-suppression treatments for tall girls despite serious medical risks and little or no evidence of benefit to psychosocial functioning. A survey of 59,632 adults shows that most tall women are satisfied with their height, which raises questions about the continued use of growth-suppression treatments."

So I am bored in my University library pretending to work on my psychology paper when I typed "tall women" into the psych library resource search. The article goes more in depth, but that is the abstract. I was just wondering if anyone had any thoughts on it. I always think about how much I would love to be shorter, but would I really change my daughter to "save" her from my fate? I am also wondering if anyone has any thoughts on being a tall female from the psychological viewpoint. The article says that it doesnapos;t really matter, but I feel that it has a drastic impact on my self esteem...

Sorry, I have a psych midterm in a couple of hours and am in a kinda psych-nerd mind set.
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